Archive

This page is about the original CNN news, a collection of all the originals will be posted here:

Original:

The Neptune has landed

Hello and welcome to CNN (Crater News Network) I'm Peter Crabsquid.

Coming up:

~ The return of Riley

~ Crabsnakes re-united

~ Decreasing Gelsack population

Riley Robinson has recently returned to 4546B inside the rocket he constructed. According to Warper 241 Riley, "Went into space and attempted to return home. They refused to allow him home and, rather then stay in space while the legal documents were sorted, he returned to 4546B. He is currently reclining in the safe shallows base and would like to be left alone."

As a reminder, Riley is to be treated as highly dangerous. He has been informed about preserving the planet and now eats only plants he farms, but he still may lash out at you if you attack him. be warned.

In lighter news, the Crabsnakes have found their missing eggs. The 12 Crabsnake eggs appear to have rolled out of their mushroom home when a mushroom was being evacuated, due to decay. While the eggs were unharmed, the families were very shaken and would like to remind other Crabsnakes to always double-check their mushrooms.

The resign of Gel sacks has been a shock to many in these trying times, but the source can now be determined, Riley, after promising to stop killing and eating us began to farm the native plants near his bases. In doing so he unwittingly took many Gel sacks far from their proper areas. He is willing to return many Gel sacks to their native places in return for us bringing any unneeded scrap we find to the large base in the deep reef. Please lend a hand if you can, either searching for scrap, or giving food to the hungry, we are in this together.

All of the news reports inspired by it (in part 1) are as follows:

(keeping in mind I had to search through that entire comment thread for all of them)

Welcome To CNN (crater news report) News! Its Your Host Jerry Reaper And We Have Some CNN News!

Riley Robinson lately came back to 4546B, And He Said That He Was going to stay for a Year or Two On 4546B! He Also Made a acid Mushroom Farm! While All the Reapers And Ghosts were Happy about His Arrival, The Infamous Sea Dragon Has been attempting To Kill Riley Robinson!

While The Sea Dragon Was Planning The Plan, One Of Our Red Eyeyes Saw Him Planning His Plan And Reported to CNN News! According to Billy The Red Eyeye, He Was Stalking And Kidnapping The Crab Snakes And Corrupted Them! But Luckily The Sea Dragon Was Sent To Jail By Warper 563!

Our Last Line Of CNN News Is Pretty Good Actually, Riley Robinson Was Actually Helping Warper 563 And Billy The Red Eyeye Send The Sea Dragon To Jail! Now that The Sea Dragon Is In Jail And 4546B is Safe From Is Wrath, Riley Robinson, Warper 563 And Billy The Red Eyeye Saved 4546B!

Thanks for Watching CNN News As Always Its your Host Jerry Reaper!

Also, a tiny bit of CNN

Hello everybody, its your host, Jerry Reaper(actually Bob Ampeel). After a surprise vote on the Council of the Crater, the precursor facility where the last Sea Emperor was housed until her eggs hatched has been designated as a National Landmark in memory of the Sea Emperor. The 2 remaining Sea Dragons have been hired as guards.

Another bit of news: A surprise outbreak of the Kharaa bacterium in a small Floating Island community has all 5 Sea Emperors working overtime to get enough Enzyme-42 to all the residents! The community has been placed under quarantine, and the Sea Emperor is already having cures delivered to the town. That will be all for now, Im your host, Bob Ampeel, and we'll be back soon with more news.

Ok So We Have An Official CNN News Channel

Seamoth549(and my old friend thelastdeerfox): Peter Crab Squid

Snowman670: Jerry Reaper

Peepers Are Scary: Bob Ampeel

TeamTrees!: Isaac Jellyray

We Have a Really Cool News Channel! :D

Snowman670: My Area That I Report News IS the Blood Kelp And The Dunes. Im going to make the dunes Base for the CNN News. (AKA Jerry Reaper's CNN News Base)

Seamoth549: I cover the huge cave systems (LZ, DGR, ILZ, LL) and info about Ryley Robinson.

Peepers are scary: I'll do the Safe Shallows, the Underwater Islands, and the Kelp Forest.

Another broadcast of: CNN! Crater News Network

With your host, Peter Crabsquid

The eldest Sea Emp, (Joey) is nominating that he and 2 other sea emperors should migrate the planet to cure Kharaa. Of course, the outbreak on the floating island will have a bit more difficulty recovering, but it can be done! So far, Loey (the youngest sea emp) has volunteered to go with his brother, and Martha (the smart one) is opting that they should go to sector zero as their first stop. Meanwhile, a plan is being put into place to get enzyme 42 distributed into the jellyshroom caves. Ryley Robinson promises to help with the aid of his submersibles.

Another broadcast of: CNN! Crater News Network

With your host, Peter Crabsquid

Recent watchers will be worrying about the outbreak on the floating island, but don't fear! our local sea emp, Clancy, (the helpful one) has finally cured the inhabitants of the floating island! things were tough, but with the help of Ryley, it's done! Martha, before she leaves the crater, is promising to teach R yley something... but we don't know what it is yet!

* distant explosion*

This just in...

A massive detonation has occurred in the aurora after a bleeder accidentally latched onto the drive core... the radiation area is increasing, and local fauna are in danger! residents have been warned to evacuate the area immediately!

I've just been notified that 3 reapers died from the explosion, and 5 more are missing...

Hang on tight, people, you can make it!

Don't worry it can all be fixed by going to the northern blood kelp zone and hiding in the caves :D If you are a reaper leviathan the please remain inside the dunes until Ryley fixes the spaceship. Thank you! :D

Peepers are scary: I'm calling Ryley. he's got experience in that field.

Seamoth549: He has a repair tool, yup

But according to some basic calculations, he will need 45 radiation suits... something he can' do!

(here's why: WOULD YOU LIKE TO WHERE THAT MANY LAYERS OF COATS? no.)

HappyFacerPlayz: If it's to save 4546B it's totally worth it. (I guess that's where the overflow of lead is going to)

Seamoth549: That's not what i meant

1: he can't swim with that many layers

2: they wouldn't fit

3: the radiation suit isn't designed for that

HappyFacerPlayz: We must find an anti-radiation system for the seamoth/cyclops also in your news report you said that 5 went missing and 3 dead does that mean the crash zone is not full of reapers anymore?

Peepers are scary: Yes, and the one that lives partially in the bulb zone is either dead or missing. with a lead-titanium alloy we might be able to create a radiation suit that can get into the Aurora, or we could, in the fabricator, take a radiation suit, add more lead and buoyancy items to keep it from just sinking. for instance, with some buoyant parts from the bulbs in the Deep Grand, we can keep it from falling, and make it look cool too.

Seamoth549: We may need to have some sort of radiation-proof prawn suit tho

Also, about the reapers: 4 have been found trapped under a pile of debris in the bulb zone. they are injured, but okay. Ryley, once their sworn enemy, is now giving all of his medkits to them. 1 reaper leviathan is still missing.

Update on the situation:

Ryley has now managed to modify his radiation suit to be able to enter the Aurora safely, however, the path to the engine room is much too dangerous to enter at this time.

Good News: The Reapers In The Dunes Have Been Working On Something for Weeks. I Dont Know what It Is Yet But They Told Me Its Like A Suit Thats Going to Let Riley Safely Repair The Aurora.

With the mods to his radiation suit, he could technically mod his PRAWN to be able to clear some of the wreckage. the dunes reapers might be working on that

Welcome back to CNN news (Crater news network)

During the intense radiation overflow, the stalkers inside the kelp forest have been found wandering into the grassy plateaus!

The stalkers have been eating the lifeforms inside the grassy plateaus causing the grassy plateaus to become an endangered place!

As you all know, the sand sharks hate the stalkers and are starting to fight back. Many of the lifeforms such as the biter have migrated down into the jellyshroom caves causing them to die of water pressure!

The grassy plateaus can become extinct if the stalkers are not dealt with immediately!

Thanks for watching another episode of CNN! Peace folks

Welcome Back To CNN News! (crater news network) As Always, Its Your Host Jerry Reaper.

The Dunes Reaper Scientists have Told Me The Upgraded Prawn Suit Will Be Finished By Tomorrow!

But Lately In The Dunes, The Stalkers Have Even Infested The Dunes! Causing Even More Sea Creatures To Fight Back And Move To New Places! Some Reapers Have Even started Moving Into The Void!

I Have Lately Looked In The Blood Kelp Zone And This is NOT Good News:

The Crabsquids Have Been Fleeing Into The Lost River Because Some Wild Reapers From The Mountains Attacked The Blood Kelp Zone! If This Does Not Stop, 4546B Will Become Extinct.

Thanks For Watching Another Broadcast Of CNN! As Always, Its Your Host, Jerry Reaper.

CNN!

Ryley's prawn is ready to enter the aurora, and since we can't follow him, we will have to wait till he comes out...

If he comes out...

No i just got a report that the aurora Was Fixed! Riley Did It!

VICTORY!

Welcome back to another CNN news report!

All of the creatures on 4546B congratulate Riley on making it out alive!

But the jellyrays have been acting very weird lately around the mushroom forest! They have been crashing into the mushroom trees causing their depopulation chart to rise!

If Riley does not realize this soon, then the mushroom forest may be doomed!

Thanks for watching another CNN news report and peace out!

The reaper scientists are studying this rare thing, they said that the mushroom forest was infected by a virus. they said its known as the khaara and we are All Doomed if we dont stop it. luckily, they are close to a cure. so any creatures that enter the mushroom forest, Please wear A Radiation Suit.

Kharaa is a bacterium(bacteria)

And it is still in the mushroom forest and everywhere else

The sea emps are having a hard time

Well

Radiation levels decreasing

We can see his prawn

Oof

He needs a first aid kit, ASAP!

Ok Bad News, The Stalkers Are Taking over the Grassy Plateaus Evern More And If We Dont Send Them To 4546B Prison, The Grassy Plateaus And Possibly The Whole Crater, Will Be Doomed! Somebody Needs To Make This Stop, AND CALL The Police OR ELSE THE GRASSY PLATEAUS WILL BE EXTINCT!!!

I Have A CNN Report

Whats Coming Up:

-The Bane Of Crabsnakes

-A Possible Cure For The Khaara

-Grassy Plateaus Saved

Welcome Back to Another CNN Report! Its Your Host, Isaac Jellyray!

The Local Crabsnakes Have Reported Enemies Coming into the Jellyshroom Caves! The stalkers. They Have Fled Into the Jellyshroom Caves! Now They Might Make Crabsnakes Extinct! Luckily, 2 Of The Crabsnakes With Their Egg Escaped.

Jerry Reaper Told Me Some Good News, The Reaper Scientists In the Dunes said they are close to a cure, The Only thing is, They Need DNA From Every Singly Creature. Scary, Jerry Reaper Was The First To Get The DNA Test, I am going to be tested for DNA tomorrow to get closer to the khaara Cure!

Remember When I Said The Stalkers "Fled" Into the Jellyshroom Caves, Well, Somebody Called the Police And The Stalkers Hid In The Jellyshroom Caves. Well At Least The Grassy Plateaus Are Safe! :D

Cant Wait Til Next Report! Thank You For Looking At This News Report! As Always, Its Your Host, Isaac Jellyray! Bye!

Whats coming up:

-The Cure Is Finished

-Stalker Problem Dealed With

-Another Problem

Hello Guys! Welcome back to Another CNN News Report! Its Your Host, Jerry Reaper.

The Kharaa Cure Prototype Is Finished! But Its Only For Testing. The Reaper Scientists Need More DNA to make a full Vaccine And Cure. The Reason We Need DNA is to Create A Weaker Version Of What Is Causing The Kharaa. They Said That If We Give Every Creature On 4546B 2 Doses of this Weaker Version, The People Who Were Dosed Would Never Get Kharaa ever, And It Works! But only on Isaac Jellyray.

Good News, The Stalkers Were Sent to Prison And Said They Were Never Going to Harm Any Sea Creature Again. Maybe Over the years, They will Evolve into Herbivores.

But We Do Have Another Problem, The Ice Worm Leviathans, Shadow Leviathans, And Checilerates From Sector 0, They Are Coming Here! After This News Report, An Emergency Warning Will Appear. As Soon As The Warning Starts, Everybody Hide In The Lava Castle.

Stay Safe Guys! Dont Let The Enemies Get into the Lava Zone. NOW RUN!!!!!!!!!!!!

[Sirens Sound] [Emergency Warning Alerts] [Distant Roars]

It's ok guys! They're weak to fire! Me and Pablo got this!

* distant* Wait, Pablo how many are there? What? How are there so many?

Well, at least we'll be able to stop eating Reapers. Jerry's too nice to eat.

Anyway, FOR THE REPUBLIC!!!

Do you know how many Ice Worms there are? I've eaten at least 30. They taste great, but even I have limits to how many leviathans I can eat. And that's only the Ice Worms. There's still the ones that spit the blue slime, the ones with the mandible things, AND the zombie-looking ones. Even Pablo's starting to run out of space for all these leviathans. Can someone else come and help?

BREAKING NEWS: Joey the sea emp is fighting... no, teaching the leviathans via telepathic communication! It appears to be a sort of meditation class... even species from the crater are joining in! I'm asking joey the sea emp where he learned this...

---<<>>---

Well, there you have it, folks!

And if you see a hostile void chelicerate, WHO YOU GONNA CALL? GHOSTBUSTERS

Bad News From Isaac Jellyray:

Theres A Factory Just Outside The Crater Creating More Chelicerates, Shadow Leviathans, Ice Worms And LIVE frozen leviathans!!!! i dont know How Thats Possible BUT Even Worse News, Im Going To Have Move Everybody To Rileys Base In Sector Zero Because Guess What, THEY FOUND THE LAVA ZONE!

Ok there are way too many leviathans. Someone call Steve and Alex. I heard they were trying to tame some Enderdragons. Also please hurry. These frozen leviathans are like cockroaches and they disgust me. They're also swarming me please get them off.

* sounds of pickaxe mining*

* netherite sword slashing*

Did somebody call for: Steve and Alex?

And now we've moved to CNN: Part 2!